King of all wild things.

How about I save him the trip and just come down to your room and 'kick your ass eleven ways to sunday'?

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I probably deserved that but dude, Jared's calling other dudes 'dear'. It's kinda fucked up.

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Jared's speech patterns are his business, regardless of how stereotypical they may or may not be.

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I'm not saying, I'm just saying. He's all I AM NOT GAY and then he's like, calling dudes 'dear' and, okay, look, you're gayer than a bag of Kurt Hummels, you can own that shit because you're fucking honest about it. But Jared's like, either he's a fratboy doucheboot or he's like hitting on dudes and acting well, pretty gay, and I'm not saying either one is like wrong (okay, being a fratboy doucheboot is wrong) but he needs to make up his fucking mind and either OWN IT and just admit he's gay or bi or whatever or CUT IT THE SHIT OUT and act like a straight dude.

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gayer than a bag of Kurt Hummels

I thought that you did not watch Glee.

Behavior and sexuality are not 'either/or'. The idea of 'acting like a straight dude' or 'acting gay' are wildly offensive. Yes, stereotypes exist, largely because those stereotypes are somewhat accurate on average. That does not mean that a person is required to 'act' according to that stereotype simply because they identify as a member of that group.

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But he's acting like a stereotype and NOT being a member of the group, that's like the problem.

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There is no problem, except in your ignorance in thinking that that -is- a problem.

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It's just weird. He's all "NOT GAY" and then he's kissing dudes and like, acting like a stereotype and WTF.

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Saying "it's just weird" is fine. Having that kind of opinion about how he confuses you is fine, so long as you are not making offensive judgments about it.

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Okay but I'm allowed to think he's a doucheboot, right?

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But he's acting like a stereotype and NOT being a member of the group, that's like the problem.

. . . so you consider this a problem, and yet how many years have we been friends?

Not that I go so far as to make out with members of my own sex, but Jen and I once compared hair products and even with her tragic colouring addiction I won the day.

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It's the like, making out and then being like BUT NOT GAY crap that really bugs me. The other stuff's just Jared being, whatever, I dunno.

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I can think of any number of reasons why the essentially heterosexual male would kiss another man. For example:

1) A bet.
2) Intoxication.
3) Curiousity.
4) Boredom.
5) Jay.

Once or twice I myself have been subject to two, possibly three of these reasons before coming to Xavier's, though as I found the experience generally underwhelming I never saw a reason to recreate it.

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6) Jared's a doucheboot.

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This may also be so. Nonetheless, the point still stands: let he who has never kissed another man cast the first stone.

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I'm just saying if you're gonna go kissing other dudes, at least quit with the "BUT NOT GAY" and like, calling people fags and shit.

it's like, less that he's all calling Wade dear, except totally WTF, and more like that he is seriously homophobic and crap and then goes and tries to, I dunno, be gay.

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I still fail to see the problem. If he is in denial, as you seem to be implying, that is certainly of no one's concern but his own. If he is rather simply "weird", then, well . . . I see little use railing against whatever mannerisms you find most irksome. It is unlikely to change them. If anything, I am inclined to think it would only intensify the issue.

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